Watching Queen of the Damned

I’ve seen Queen of the Damned before. Around when it came out, so 2002? I know that it’s terrible; but my new Korn obsession combined with knowing (being reminded of?) Jonathan Davis involvement in the soundtrack I had to give it another watch.

Besides, I used to love Anne Rice when I was younger; Queen of the Damned was my favorite of all her production. Maybe it’d be different this time?

….

No it wasn’t.

It was exactly the same. I usually like crappy movies (example: Blair Witch Project 2, I just think it’s way better than the first movie, clearly I have no taste); but this. What is this?

Here’s what I wonder;

Why are they trying to fit not just the one but two 400+ page novels into one hour and a half movie? Who thought this was a brilliant idea and why?? Despite the title, it’s in fact not based on Queen of the Damned only, but also the second book in the series The Vampire Lestat.

…far be it from me to say, but I do wonder who was in charge of casting. Was someone in charge? Did people bribe their way into the movie? There are literally no more than 2 good castings in this movie; Lena Olin who plays Maharet, and well, I might be biased, but I do buy Davis as the scalper.

And while we’re on the subject of Maharet; couldn’t they just have given her more space? Not only because not crap casting, but also because in the book this is quite an interesting characters. I recall her story as being one of my favorite stories in a book of all time. There’s a lovely section where she’s going to eat the brain and eyes as a part of burial ceremony. Not that that in itself is great, it’s gross. It’s just, it sticks with you.

Did nobody realize that the story in the movie is completely incomprehensible? What is the story even? Did they make it for those of us who’ve read the book(s) only, because there is no way to understand it unless you have.

Why did they have to focus on Lestat as rockstar? Why? It’s horrible. The world they paint is like when Jonathan in Buffy the Vampire Slayer casts a spell turning him into a James Bond type character in their world. Which only works because it is clear it is a spell and it is then broken. As a viewer, I cannot accept this world. It doesn’t make sense. And not because there are vampires. It lacks internal logic.

Akasha. Again, another favorite character from a book. I wanted to call a cat Akasha for the longest time. However. The Akasha in the movie is nothing like the Akasha in the book. Part of the problem is the casting.

In what world would someone who looks and acts like Stuart Townsend sound like Jonathan Davis?

Also. I much preferred Tom Cruise as Lestat. He was angry and raging. It was fun.

Maybe their mission was to ruin Queen of the Damned for all readers everywhere? If so, congratuwelldone!

This movie makes me sad.

Then again. I’ve only got myself to blame. Could have just watched Buffy instead. If I knew what was good for me, I would have.

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